Dear Bishop Kee, Lutheran Church in Singapore, Brothers and Sisters in Christ, and dear teachers and friends in Australia and beyond.

I did not know how to begin this update. But this morning I was reading the Epistle Reading for this Sunday (Ephesians 5:15-20; Aug 16th), through which I was reminded that even though the days are evil, and hence, tragedies occur, we are called to fill our lives with worship and thanks in Christ our Lord. Thus I shall begin, and end, this closing update with thanksgiving. I ask you to make each item of thanks your own prayer as well.

I give all thanks, praise, glory and honour to our good and gracious God who has blessed me immeasurably with a wife who can only be described as wonderful. For twelve years I have had the unique privilege of having Aileen Lee as my wife, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish; and to be loved and cherished by her. Now, in the wisdom of God, death has parted us.

The Lord gives, the Lord takes away, and praised be the name of the Lord. I give thanks to the Lord for our two great children, Benedict and Gracia. Although only seven and five years old this year, they have thus far handled the loss of their dear mother well. Aileen would be proud of them, as I am. Perhaps they may not yet fully understand, but they know their mom is in heaven, and smiling upon us. Not only that, they make sure that I know that too!

I give thanks to the Lord that He gave Aileen a peaceful death. He received her into His eternal arms in peace, in her sleep, and surrounded by her family. The children and I were there, her parents, her brother and sister, and my sister, we were all present at her final breath. I witnessed the last few hours of her suffering, and prayed that if the Lord willed that she should depart, and then grant her a peaceful and painless death. The Lord heard my humble plea, and granted it, on the 9th of August 2009, the 10th Sunday after Pentecost, 11 am., in the Assisi Hospice. The Gospel for that day was John 6:35,41-51 in which Jesus said: “I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever.” With this promise we trust that her next breath would be in heaven, and we receive the Lord’s comfort.

I give thanks to the Lord that He limited her suffering. On the 28th of July Aileen was transferred from National University Hospital to Assisi Hospice.

Her condition was improving during the first week in the Hospice. But on Friday 7th August she suddenly stopped talking. Her speech, sight and writing were impaired, most likely due to the aggressive cancer. On Sunday morning 9th August, at about 6am, I noticed that her hands were cold and sweaty and she was having difficulty breathing. The Hospice nurses gave her injections which helped her to breathe more smoothly until the end. Despite the long and painful battle with cancer, the marked deterioration of her condition was still very sudden and unexpected. Nevertheless, He has ended her suffering and she is with Him for eternity, where there is no more pain, sorrow and death. In faith her battle with terrible sickness was at last...won.

I give thanks to the Lord for all those who have walked this long journey with Aileen and me.

• First and foremost, our families, and our relatives. They have seen to the care of our children, and of Aileen herself, during our one-and-a-half year struggle with cancer. They continue to look after us and our children, and help provide for our needs.
• Bishop Kee; Bishop Tan; all our co-workers, your families and your congregations; teachers and friends in Australia, America, Germany and elsewhere; the Pastors, staff and congregations of QLC and YCCL; and the Principal, Faculty and friends of Singapore Bible College. Thank you for the overwhelming outpouring of prayer, gifts and all manner of support. My non-Christian relatives have been impressed by your love, and the tremendous response at the Night Service (11th Aug.) and Funeral (12th Aug). Thank you for being a concrete expression of God’s love to us all, and for committing yourselves to continue blessing us.
• The Doctors and nurses of NUH and Assisi Hospice, especially Drs. Andrea Wong, Jason Phua, Wong Lea Chung, Rachel Wong, for your professional and compassionate care for Aileen.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for being on this and difficult journey with us. The mutual consolation of the faithful in Christ has brought much comfort. As I have shared with some of you, Aileen meant the world to me. Life and ministry without her will never be the same. This is the saddest time of my life. While I may never fully recover from losing Aileen, I know that God will help me to cope. She occupies a place in my heart that cannot be filled by any other person. Aileen knew that her calling was to be a wife and mother, and she devoted herself to us. She loved to worship and serves in quiet ways and did so faithfully and fervently until she was no longer able to. I pray that the Lord may grant His grace that I may help my children to treasure and honour the memory of their mother who loved them with all that she had.

And so I give thanks and praise to God, the blessed Trinity, for the wondrous favour of knowing Aileen, and to be known by her, a wife of noble character, worth far more than rubies, who brought good to her family all the days of her life.

May our Good and Gracious Lord bless her memory, that it shall last forever in our hearts. As Aileen’s life is now filled with eternal worship in heaven, may our lives also be filled with heavenly heaven, may our lives also be filled with heavenly worship here on earth. I know she would wish that for us all. Lord, in your mercy. Hear our prayer.

~ Rev Soh Guan Kheng